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Funny Baseball Quotes - Funny Quotes about Baseball Hit the ball over the fence and you can take your time going around the bases.
More funny John W. Raper quotes
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Abbott: Now, on the St. Louis team we have Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third.
Costello: That's what I want to find out.
More funny Lou Costello quotes
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Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian.
More funny H. L. Mencken quotes
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For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown into innings.
More funny Earl Wilson quotes
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After I hit a home run I had a habit of running the bases with my head down. I figured the pitcher already felt bad enough without me showing him up rounding the bases.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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Hitting the ball was easy. Running around the bases was the tough part.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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I always loved the game, but when my legs weren't hurting it was a lot easier to love.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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I hated to bat against Drysdale. After he hit you he'd come around, look at the bruise on your arm and say, 'Do you want me to sign it?'
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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It's unbelievable how much you don't know about the game you've been playing all your life.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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When I hit a home run I usually didn't care where it went. So long as it was a home run was all that mattered.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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You don't realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth.
More funny Mickey Mantle quotes
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It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
More funny Hank Aaron quotes
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Candlestick was built on the water. It should have been built under it."
More funny Roger Maris quotes
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Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It's rolling all the way back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!
More funny Jerry Coleman quotes
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If he raced his pregnant wife he'd finish third. (on catcher Mide Scioscia)
More funny Tommy Lasorda quotes
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Aw, how could he (Jorge Orta) lose the ball in the sun, he's from Mexico.
More funny Harry Caray quotes
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I would always sing it (Take Me Out To The Ball Game), because I think it's the only song I knew the words to!
More funny Harry Caray quotes
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They (Expos fans) discovered 'boo' is pronounced the same in French as it is in English.
More funny Harry Caray quotes
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You know they're not going to lose 162 consecutive games.
More funny Harry Caray quotes
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The kid doesn't chew tobacco, smoke, drink, curse, or chase broads. I don't see how he can possibly make it.
More funny Richie Ashburn quotes
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People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make $500,000.00.
More funny Pete Incaviglia quotes
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All I want is for my case to be heard before an impractical decision-maker.
More funny Pete Rose quotes
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I think I was the best baseball player I ever saw.
More funny Willie Mays quotes
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I'd rather hit than have sex.
More funny Reggie Jackson quotes
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Well, that was a cliff-dweller.
More funny Wes Westrum quotes
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A baseball bat is a wondrous weapon.
More funny Ty Cobb quotes
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I believe in rules. Sure I do. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them?
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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As long as I've got a chance to beat you I'm going to take it.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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Baseball is like church. Many attend; few understand.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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Buy a steak for a player on another club after the game, but don't even speak to him on the field. Get out there and beat them to death.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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Give me some scratching, diving, hungry ballplayers who come to kill you.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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God watches over drunks and third baseman.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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How you play the game is for college ball. When you're playing for money, winning is the only thing that matters.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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I made a game effort to argue but two things were against me: the umpires and the rules.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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If I were playing third base and my mother were rounding third with the run that was going to beat us, I'd trip her. Oh, I'd pick her up and brush her off and say, "Sorry, Mom," but nobody beats me.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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If you don't win, you're going to be fired. If you do win, you've only put off the day you're going to be fired.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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In order to become a big-league manager you have to be in the right place at the right time. That's rule number one.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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In the olden days, the umpire didn't have to take any courses in mind reading. The pitcher told you he was going to throw at you.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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Some guys are admired for coming to play, as the saying goes. I prefer those who come to kill.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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You argue with the umpire because there is nothing else you can do about it.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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You don't save a pitcher for tomorrow. Tomorrow it may rain.
More funny Leo Durocher quotes
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The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided.
More funny Casey Stengel quotes
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Now, on the St. Louis team we have Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third.
More funny Bud Abbott quotes
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