The Joke Computer Diagnosis

Read the funny Computer Diagnosis joke in Technology Jokes to make you laugh out loud :) See how long you can go with a straight face :| after seeing the Computer Diagnosis joke at BasicJokes.com!
Computer Diagnosis

Computer Diagnosis Joke |
---|
What's The Joke Computer Diagnosis?
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better." |
More Jokes

Funny Jokes Of The Day
- Classic Booty Call... Angels ‐ I didn't know angels could fly …
- Frog With Special Diet ‐ One night a man walked into a bar …
- Pulling His Cheney ‐ George W. Bush ran into Colin Powell`s …
- Dog Balls ‐ Q. What do you call a dog that …
- The Vacuum Business Sucks ‐ A vacuum salesman goes door-to-door …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Conclusion ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, she can't even …
- Yo' Mama Is So Nasty... Velcro ‐ Yo' Mama is so nasty, it sounds …
- Monica's Cheeks ‐ Q: Why are Monica Lewinsky's cheeks …
- Robot Booty Call... Better ‐ You make me want to become a better …
- Hoshimota ‐ An American businessman is on a …
- And You're Not Even Drunk ‐ Q: What did the pollock say when …
- Blonde's Mating Call ‐ Q: What is the mating call of a …
- Gay Frogs ‐ Q: What did one lesbian frog say …
- Gourmet Booty Call... Knife ‐ No, that's a 20-centimeter Henckels …
- Lunch is back ‐ Q: Why do blondes need see through …
- Yo' Mama Is So Old... Dinosaur ‐ Yo' Mama is so old, she was the …
- Fuzzy Vision ‐ Q: Why did the gynecologist go …
- Room 88 ‐ A virgin boy turns 18, and asks …
- Up or Down ‐ An elderly couple sets sail on …
- Yo' Mama Is So Nasty... Bacon ‐ Yo' Mama is so nasty, she uses …