Marriage Jokes

A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy ambassador at a very expensive restaurant in New York.

The ambassador was so enthralled by her beauty that he asked her to marry him. The secretary knew she couldn't insult a foreign dignitary, so she decided to let him down easy.

"I'll only marry you under three conditions."

"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.

"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a 72-karat diamond, along with a 28-inch studded matching necklace for our engagement."

The ambassador picked up his cell phone, called his personal accountant, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"

"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest part of the Hamptons, along with a 40-acre summer home in the sweetest vineyards of France."

The ambassador picked up his phone, called his personal brokers in New York and France, and said, "Yes, yes, I build, I build!"

The secretary knew she must think of a final request that would be impossible to live up to.

"Finally," she said. "I'll only marry you if you have a 10-inch penis."

A sad face befell the ambassador, and he cupped his face in his hands. After weeping, the ambassador slowly lifted his head and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"