Sports Jokes

"It was too bad I wasn't a second baseman; then I'd probably have seen a lot more of my husband."

--Karolyn Rose, ex-wife of Pete Rose, 1981

"It's a weird scene. You win a few baseball games and all of a sudden, you're surrounded by reporters and TV men with cameras asking you about Vietnam and race relations."

--Vida Blue, 1971

"I watch a lot of baseball on the radio."

--Gerald Ford, 1978

"It's a beautiful day for a night game."

--Announcer Frankie Frisch

"The most important things in life are good friends and a strong bull pen."

--Pitcher Bob Lemon, 1981

"Well, that kind of puts a damper on another Yankees win."

--Announcer Phil Rizzuto, after a news bulletin reporting the death of Pope Paul VI, 1978

"They brought me up with the Brooklyn Dodgers, which at time was in Brooklyn."

--Casey Stengel, 1962

"I won't play for a penny less than $1500."

--Honus Wagner, turning down an offer of $2000