The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram

Read the funny Preparing for Your Mammogram joke in Doctor Jokes to make you laugh out loud :) See how long you can go with a straight face :| after seeing the Preparing for Your Mammogram joke at BasicJokes.com!
Preparing for Your Mammogram

Preparing for Your Mammogram Joke |
---|
What's The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram?
Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in the privacy of your own home.
Exercise #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Repeat with the other breast. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again. Exercise #2 Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Do this again in case the last time wasn't effective enough. Then repeat with the other breast. Exercise #3 Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the concrete floor is just perfect. Take off all your warm clothes and lay comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until the breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast. CONGRATULATIONS! Now you are properly prepared for your mammogram. |
More Jokes

Funny Jokes Of The Day
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... National Weather Agency ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, the National …
- A Horoscope For The Workplace ‐ ASTROLOGY: tells us about you …
- Golf Advice ‐ Out on the golf course, a beautiful …
- Dead Frog ‐ A young boy walks into a whore …
- Dead Mama ‐ A blonde goes into work one morning …
- Walks Into a Bar... Leprechaun Pee ‐ A leprechaun walks into a bar. …
- Toothpaste Inventor ‐ Q: How do you know that someone …
- Clown Booty Call... Pie ‐ Wanna throw your pie in my face? …
- Who is Marylou?!? ‐ A woman came up behind her husband …
- Half Bush ‐ Bush's mother prayed fervently …
- Tasties in a Half Shell ‐ Q: Why did God invent …
- Mr. Ho and Mr. Wen ‐ Once there were two chinese gentlemen …
- Blonde Fish ‐ If a blonde could be any fish, …
- The Royal Honeymoon ‐ On the day of her wedding to Prince …
- Rattlesnake vs. Flaccid... ‐ What do a rattlesnake and a soft …
- Troubled Man ‐ A guy has a bad habit: He loves …
- Female Comebacks ‐ Man: Haven't I seen you someplace …
- Lucky Breaks & Crying Shames ‐ Q: What is the definition of a …
- Las Vegas Pro ‐ A guy is walking along the strip …
- Afterlife for IRS Cheaters ‐ Tony and his friend John die in …