The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram

Basic Jokes

Read the funny Preparing for Your Mammogram joke in Doctor Jokes to make you laugh out loud :) See how long you can go with a straight face :| after seeing the Preparing for Your Mammogram joke at BasicJokes.com!

Preparing for Your Mammogram

Preparing for Your Mammogram Hilarious Joke
Preparing for Your Mammogram Joke

What's The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram?

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in the privacy of your own home.

Exercise #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Repeat with the other breast. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again.

Exercise #2 Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Do this again in case the last time wasn't effective enough. Then repeat with the other breast.

Exercise #3 Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the concrete floor is just perfect. Take off all your warm clothes and lay comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until the breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast.
CONGRATULATIONS! Now you are properly prepared for your mammogram.

More Jokes

Laughing At Funny Joke
Funny Jokes By Type

Funny Jokes Of The Day