The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram

Read the funny Preparing for Your Mammogram joke in Doctor Jokes to make you laugh out loud :) See how long you can go with a straight face :| after seeing the Preparing for Your Mammogram joke at BasicJokes.com!
Preparing for Your Mammogram

Preparing for Your Mammogram Joke |
---|
What's The Joke Preparing for Your Mammogram?
Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in the privacy of your own home.
Exercise #1: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Repeat with the other breast. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year and do it again. Exercise #2 Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Do this again in case the last time wasn't effective enough. Then repeat with the other breast. Exercise #3 Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the concrete floor is just perfect. Take off all your warm clothes and lay comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until the breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast. CONGRATULATIONS! Now you are properly prepared for your mammogram. |
More Jokes

Funny Jokes Of The Day
- You Silly Blonde. Don't You Get It? ‐ A blonde was at home watching TV …
- Loser Booty Call... Bus Pass ‐ Want to get out of this place? …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... High-Five ‐ Yo' Mama so fat, I can stand on …
- Shoot The Pig ‐ A farmhand is driving 'round the …
- Hit TV Shows in Iraq ‐ "Husseinfeld" …
- Tattoo Idea ‐ Q: Why is it a good idea to tattoo …
- Walks Into a Bar... The Whole Gang ‐ A nun, a priest, an Irishman, a …
- Frog Talk ‐ A grandson runs up to his grandfather …
- Yo' Mama Is So Short... Ladder ‐ Yo' Mama is so short, she had to …
- Yo' Mama Is Like... Saint ‐ Yo' Mama is like a saint -- a St. …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Legs ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, when she walks …
- Eating Out ‐ A guy is going down on a prostitute. …
- Dirty Tigger! ‐ Why is Tigger always so dirty? …
- Pirate Booty Call... Deck ‐ Blimey, I could live on your poop …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Fire Department ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, she's gotta …
- Basketball Chicken ‐ Why did the chicken cross the basketball …
- Redneck Recycling ‐ Q: What do Rednecks call four empty …
- What Did You Say About Mama?!? ‐ Three guys are drinking in a bar …
- Actual School Excuse Notes ‐ These are excuse notes from parents …
- A smart blonde, a stupid blonde and Santa ... ‐ A smart blonde, a stupid blonde …