The Joke The Amazing Health Computer

Read the funny The Amazing Health Computer joke in Men/Women to make you laugh out loud :) See how long you can go with a straight face :| after seeing the The Amazing Health Computer joke at BasicJokes.com!
The Amazing Health Computer

The Amazing Health Computer Joke |
---|
What's The Joke The Amazing Health Computer?
One day, Jeffrey complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts, I guess I should see a doctor."
"Don't do that! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Jeffery figured he had nothing to lose, so he took his urine sample to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited $10.00. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter's using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife's pregnant - twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better." |
More Jokes

Funny Jokes Of The Day
- Bird it Through the Grapevine ‐ Q: Have you heard about the man …
- Asian Lady ‐ There was an Asian lady who married …
- Alien Booty Call... Heart ‐ You've stolen my heart. Luckily, …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Good Side ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, I had to take …
- Christian Drugs ‐ Jesus was worried about the drug …
- Lamaze Class ‐ The room was full of pregnant women …
- If Men Ruled the World... Work ‐ - Each year, your raise would be …
- Sick Hick ‐ A redneck felt sick and decided …
- Astronaut Booty Call... Rock ‐ Baby, I'll rock your world so hard …
- Body Talk ‐ This lady goes to the doctor for …
- Santa's Erection ‐ It was Christmas Eve, and a lady …
- And Then God Created Brunettes ‐ Q: Why did God make …
- Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Conclusion ‐ Yo' Mama is so fat, she can't even …
- Prom Booty Call... Limo ‐ Hurry up, I only have the limo …
- Motivational Speaker Booty Call... Do It ‐ Remember--you can do it! Now, how …
- Blonde in a Round Room ‐ How do you keep a blonde busy? …
- Toothpaste Inventor ‐ Q: How do you know that someone …
- Texas A&M Nativity Loss ‐ Q: Why couldn't Texas A&M put on …
- Taliban Tank Trix ‐ How do you stop a Taliban tank? …
- Lawyer vs. Snake ‐ A snake and a lawyer both got hit …